Thoughts collected in chaos

Preparing for my newborn

2011-03-27T15:44:00.001-05:00

Though I love impulse buys (that's the girlie side of me), I also totally dig researching the ends of the internet for the best products and bargains. So when I started my third trimester, every spare minute saw me glued to my laptop reading reviews and analyzing the best buys for baby gear. From my experience here are some suggestions for the other rookie moms out there.

Register! Register! Register!
I opened baby registries for 2 reasons - helps track my shopping list - completion discount is useful while buying the big ticket items. Be it for a shower(first baby) or a sprinkle(2nd or > baby) guests find it easy to click and ship the items you have chosen in your registry instead of buying gift cards. Of course there is a flip side to this - some people just can't resist buying baby clothes as gifts for a baby shower. Either ways, there is more to gain by registering than not.

Where did I register?
The first place I checked out was Babies R Us (BRU). Well, I did open a registry there but hardly used it. Items were more expensive and choices were limited.
If you open a registry in a store, you get a goody bag (samples of diapers, wipes or lotions, a free copy of Baby Talk or Parents magazine and some coupons - usually for Huggies or Pampers) and a promise for a 15% completion coupon. Though I did open the registry in a store, the completion discount mailed out to me was only for 10%. None had an explanation for it. Oh well. If you open a registry online, you can walk in to the nearest store and request a goody bag. Also for an online registry you get a 10% completion coupon.
My completion coupon was mailed out about a month in advance of my due date. I used the coupon and a couple of gift cards to buy a bunch of clothes for my little one - nothing else, just clothes from BRU and that too just because I had to use those gift cards.
Point to note: The completion coupon is only for the items remaining on your registry. So in the store, make your selection, head to the counters, request a store associate to add them to your registry and then bill out with the coupon. They might tell you that it takes 48 hours for your registry to be updated and try to convince you to just bill out without the coupon - but that was not the case with me. The items showed up immediately. You can always take a print out after scanning, check for the recent additions and then bill out.
Final word on BRU registries - not my favorite. It felt like no one was interested in helping you out, higher prices, minimal choice.
The next and my most favorite registry was on Amazon.com. I've been an Amazon customer for almost 5 years now but my appreciation for their efforts and commitment to service just tripled with my baby registry experience. Those guys just think of everything! I signed up for their "Amazon mom" program as well - free prime membership(free 2 day shipping) for the first few months and this time limit extends with every purchase you make using their service. You also have some 30 % off your first shipment. Their "subscribe and save" option is also worth looking up. You get the widest choice, best price (no tax), reliable reviews and fastest, cheapest shipping from Amazon. They give you a 10% completion discount on certain items in your registry. The coupon shows up as a banner when you sign in to your registry. So whats the catch here? Well, the coupon is only applicable for items fulfilled and shipped by Amazon -not for items bought from vendors. In my case it wasn't a big deal. The only items I couldn't use the coupon on were a crib bedding set and a couple of breast pump accessories. The amazon mom benefits and completion discount coupon are stackable - so as far as you are signed in, the discounts get applied automatically. You may want to keep an eye out for 20% coupons on baby stuff that show up in Baby Talk and Parents magazine - These coupons can also be used. All together they wipe off a huge portion of the final bill.
Have you heard of diapers.com? If not, go check it out now. As the name suggests, it sells all the baby essentials. Amazon acquired it recently. Some items sold here are even cheaper than Amazon prices. They often publish coupon codes in baby forums (What to expect, babycenter). Also, they have a bunch of specials running at all times - look at the coupons tab on their website and copy paste those coupon codes while checking out. Another perk at diapers.com - they accept manufacturers coupons. The site also offers a baby registry service with a 10% completion coupon - but the coupon is effective only from your due date. Also, when you buy items off your registry, the other specials and coupon codes do not apply. To knock off a few more dollars from your diapers.com purchase, look into the Pampers gifts to grow rewards program (pampers.com) - its pretty simple. You find pampers rewards codes (tons of them online, some from pampers product purchases) and register them to your account. Each code earns you some rewards points. When you earn enough, you can redeem them for diapers.com coupons.

For in-store purchases, I like Buy Buy Baby. They have tons of choices and much better prices than BRU. There is a registry option and you get a 10% completion coupon mailed out to you about a month in advance of your due date. When you open a registry(store or online) you get a free gift - goody bag again with magazines and samples (mine had a bib, diapers, diaper rash cream, Avent feeding bottle and some manufacturers coupons for different items).

Apart from the stores discussed here, there a ton other places where you will get exclusive stuff - pottery barn kids, land of nod, etc. These stores also have registry options. You wouldn't get the bang for your buck but the rich indulgence - yeah you'll get that plenty :)

When its time to share your registry information, it becomes difficult to list all if you have one too many. Thats when you use thebump.com. Just launch that website, navigate to baby registry tab and search for your name. Most of your registries will be listed - I say most because BRU registries are not read by thebump. It'll be an easy way to share your registry locations.

Given so many options for baby registries, I think you only need 2 - one online and one in-store - my choices are obviously amazon and buy buy baby.

Finding what you need
Ask google for a newborn shopping list and it will give you a ton of sites. The ones I found extremely useful were ConsumerReports.org and lucieslist.com. Buying an account on consumerreports would be a very good investment. Once you have an account, you will have access to baby product ratings, approximate prices / estimated values, best buy identifications for products in each category and a very useful newborn shopping list. Use the shopping list as a baseline - i felt the quantity listed was the bare minimum, in some cases I had to double the number Eg: they suggest you buy 4 sleepers in newborn size.Well I do laundry only once a week - so I just used my discretion and bought 7 instead. The reason I liked lucieslist was because it clearly states why a particular product was recommended. The reasons listed might make total sense to one person and but might not be so critical to another. But knowing and understanding the reasons for product recommendations helps you to make an informed choice.

My Shopping list
Essentials

Crib - Da Vinci Emily - consumer reports best buy - converts to a toddler bed - bought the full bed conversion kit as well - Amazon.com - I didn't prefer a bassinet because you can max use it only until the baby turns 3 months
crib mattress - MDB Emily 2 in 1 - 260 coil - Amazon.com
car seat - Chicco keyfit 30 in romantic - I chose an infant seat and plan to buy a convertible after baby turns one: the benefit of not waking a newborn while moving her out of the vehicle outweighs every argument in favor of a convertible seat - consumer reports highly recommends this product in the infant seat category - try to see the color options in a store, they look completely different from the images online - comes with an infant boot cover - Amazon.com
extra car seat base for the other vehicle - Amazon.com
Stroller- Baby trend Snap N Go - I checked out all the travel system options and found them extremely bulky and hard to maneuver - I liked this stroller frame for its light weight, compact fold, ease of use and good price - plan to buy an umbrella stroller when baby is old enough to sit up on her own - snap n go + umbrella stroller is still cheaper than a whole travel system - Amazon.com
changing pad - Colgate 3 sided contoured pad - Buy Buy Baby - I have set it on my nightstand but haven't fixed it in as my mom feels she would be more comfortable changing the baby on the bed
diaper genie elite - its more expensive than the arm and hammer one(initial cost and cost of refill bags) but when you weigh the reviews between the two, the diaper genie is rated better in keeping the smells out - most important factor for a diaper disposal - Amazon.com
diaper genie refill bags - Amazon.com (if you choose the Arm and Hammer diaper pail it takes ordinary trash bags)
Fisher price infant to toddler rocker - its a bouncer and a seat - Amazon.com - I plan to use this for baby's daytime naps as its portable
Summer infant best view video monitor - Amazon.com
Ergo baby carrier - didn't buy the newborn insert, will use a receiving blanket for head support instead - diapers.com
fisher price rainforest play mat - buy buy baby
baby book - buy buy baby

Linen

crib bedding set - 13 piece cotton set sold by GEENY through Amazon.com for $85 bucks - fitted sheet, dust ruffle, diaper stacker, toy holder, comforter, wall hangings, crib bumper
crib mobile - Lambs and Ivy mobile from Buy Buy Baby
receiving blankets - 4 - cotton flannel - Amazon.com
fitted crib sheets - 3 cotton - Amazon.com (on the mattress, put two alternating layers of waterproof pad and fitted crib sheets - it makes night time changes easy)
crib waterproof pads - 3 - Amazon.com
changing pad covers - 4 - Amazon.com

Bath & Grooming

Baby body wash - Johnson & Johnson natural head to toe foaming wash - 3 - I did not want anything with extra fragrances in it - Amazon.com
nursery essentials kit - look for one with a nasal aspirator that has an opening at the back for easy cleaning - nasal aspirator, thermometer, hair brush, nail clippers, nail file - Amazon.com

Feeding

Playtex drop-ins bottle starter set - Amazon.com
Playtex disposable 4oz 100 count liners - Amazon.com
bottle drying rack - Amazon.com
OXO bottle brush - with nipple cleaner and stand - the kind that stands on its own -Amazon.com
Munchkin dishwasher basket - for washing bottles and accessories in the dishwasher - Amazon.com
Boppy pillow - Buy Buy Baby
peanut shell nursing cover - diapers.com

Diapers and Changes

disposable changing pads - 36 count box - for use with the diaper bag - Amazon.com
Pampers swaddlers sensitive -120 count in the newborn size - there have been a lot of complaints about the dry max model, so I chose the sensitive instead - will buy more diapers after baby is born depending on birth weight - Amazon.com
Eddie Bauer diaper bag - buy buy baby
Diaper rash cream - Desitin - Costco
Baby wipes - Costco
sassy disposable diaper sacks - 200 count - diapers.com

Clothing

onesies - newborn (6) - 0 to 3 months (6)
footsies - newborn (5) - 0 to 3 months (2)
outfits - newborn (3) - 0 to 3 months(4) - 6 months (1) - 9 months (1)
socks - one size (6)
hats - one size (4)
bibs - 5
sleepsack - 1
swaddleme - 2 cotton infant size swaddlers - Amazon.com

For my Master

2010-08-14T09:58:00.000-05:00

I would not classify myself as a fervently religious person but thanks to my parents who are very spiritually inclined, I've had my fair share of exposure to spirituality. I've always been a passive listener (and I admit, at times with that "bored out of my skin" expression) when any of my family members launch into one of their discussions about enlightenment and what enlightened beings say about enlightenment.
So spiritual thinking, has in one way or another found a permanent residence in my head. And even before you ask me that question, here is my answer... I do call myself SBNR (spiritual but not religious)

So, how did I find my Master?

In 2003, when my dad mentioned Swami Nithyananda I was just mildly curious to know what was different with this Swami, that had my dad so hooked. It was more of a surprise when my mother, who until then was spiritually very neutral, seemed totally into it as well. Needless to say, she felt Swamiji's presence in every part of her life and this eventually paved the path for me. It was by her insistence that I started wearing Swamiji's malai in 2005. Everytime Swamiji was in town, I've attended his discourses on Patanjali's yoga sutras. Slowly my bonding with the Master turned from a "my mom insists" thing to a "yeah, it makes sense" feeling and till date it remains that way.

To those who have been in Swamiji's presence, I need to say no more about my experiences. But for those who haven't, well.. let me make an attempt to explain...

Being in Swamiji's presence, for me, is always like I stepped into a space with endless calm, peace and abundant happiness. Its always like meeting an old friend.
From how I see it, its like every person is a puppet - everything that makes that person tick is visualized like string. And all these strings are tied to a single hook. So the single question that remains is.. where do i stick my hook? Where is that stable strong wall where my hook will be safely attached to forever?
In many ways, Swamiji was that wall for me.

So when this scandal broke out, I was initially frozen. Didn't know how to react. My first reaction was of course denial. But when I saw the video myself, I was not so sure it was morphed as is widely claimed.
And then, came the flash of true realization - I knew it didn't matter to me. Never once while establishing this spiritual bonding with my Master did I think of his celibacy or base my faith on it. So why now, when his celibacy was questioned, should it affect me?
Though I avidly followed every blog and news report about the scandal, not once after that did I feel shaken in my beliefs.
By all this, I am not saying that what has happened is all a big conspiracy against Swamiji --- All I am saying is that I don't care. It doesn't affect me. Swamiji is the guru who opened this door to spirituality for me and for that he will forever be my Master.

Yes, It's my Grandpa's road!

2010-01-24T08:56:00.004-06:00

Have you seen this decal anywhere? If you do, look ahead.. its me at the wheel!
Its a residue from my teens... Any desi who reads this decal would get it immediately but the others don't. So I thought its high time I blogged about it.

Everytime I stop at a traffic light, my eyes automatically peek into the rearview mirror to see how the driver behind me reacts to this decal. If its a desi, I get a small smile and the others?.. well I've seen "Wha...t?!!!" , shrugs, "Whatever that means" and disinterested scans.
So, what does the phrase mean? Well it says "Yeah, this is ancestral property.. I will drive as I please!" I know its like rubbing salt when I weave like crazy and cut-off the other drivers on the highway... but what can I say man? Thats what its there to do!

It would have been more impressive if I had a BMW... it does look a little pathetic on my 105hp Yaris. :(

Tamil heroines 09 - oru alasal

2009-10-28T21:55:00.015-05:00

Nayanthara, Shriya, Tamanna, Asin and Trisha are the ladies who currently rule tamil cinema. First of all, hats off to them for all their achievements. They are smart young women who have very easily ridden the fame wave and managed to stay afloat with a good balance.

I always feel people who started out as models can hardly act. Maybe they practise the straight face - stare ahead- look so much, that they find it hard to emote. As with any rule - Aishwarya Rai is an exception to this - but the problem with her is that she emotes just too much - so much so that it leaves a sickeningly sweet after taste.
Trisha however, is no exception - she has perfected the peengan bommai looks. She had her chance under the spotlight and did good. I love the chemistry she shared with Vikram in Samy and Vijay in Gilli. That said, I fail to recall any movie in which she has impressed the audience as a character artiste. So as directors search for "newer faces" who cost them less - I think the sun is setting in the Trisha empire.

Asin entered tamil cinema with a bang - yes, M Kumaran son of Mahalakshmi was a super duper hit and won her many laurels. 2005 was an even greater year - I think she did 5 movies that year and all fared very well in the box office. But lady luck doesn't smile for too long a time - she tried to make it big in Bollywood with London dreams but has fallen flat. She would need another 2005 to carve her niche back in Kollywood - maybe that's what she is wishing for this Christmas!

The day she signed Shivaji must have been the D-Day for Shriya. Ok ok - I'll take it easy with my Rajini craziness - but you know I'm right! Shivaji crowned Shriya the reigning queen of tamil cinema - atleast it did for that year.She looked so different - awesome makeup, awesome clothes, awesome lights - well t'was a thalaivar padam, ofcourse no cost was spared. What it did for Shriya was great -it took her to the next tier and gave her the break she needed. If she could only keep a level head and stop acting like a brainless oaf in her interviews, I think she would do much better. I hope its only a farce and not her true nature, but putting on a pout and talking like a lil bebe beee weeeeeee doesn't become her one bit.

Hmm, so that leaves us with who? Nayanthara and Tamanna.

Nayanthara does a great job. I liked the character she portrayed in Yaaradi nee mohini. No frills or furs. Like the host on sunTV's top ten would say, it was "yeathartham". Nayanthara was rolly-polly in Chandramukhi and kept adding on the pounds until she almost looked like she would burst in Ghajini. But "Balelakka" in Shivaji was a welcome surprise. She had awesome toned abs but the sunken cheeks did make her look very malnourished. Looks like she has been on a yo yo with her diet but in Aadhavan she looked horrible. Maybe if she looses those "oh too heavy" lash extensions and smiles more naturally showing her pearly whites, she would look better. In the movie, her closed lip smile was so artificial, it was like she was in pain or something. Oh and ofcourse her attitude - guess its the "in " thing to have a "dude, I don't care what you think" attitude but showing too much of it in her interviews doesn't bode too well. The tamil public are infamously conservative - scandals make news - any publicity is good publicity but if its always going to be scandalous it may be better to just keep it under the wraps.

As you may have guessed, I saved Tamannah for the last, cause I think she is great. I first noticed her in the "nature power" soap adds - reason? She emoted too much! I had the "eyebrows-up -eh-look" on my face - couldn't understand why someone would try to woo the camera so much for a soap. But I guess she made her point - people did notice. Then came the sun dish ads. She looked horrible in Vyabaari. But Kaloori was the charm she was waiting for. Ever since, she has been riding the success wave. She still emotes a lot sometimes but what I like best about her is the way she comes across in her interviews - very level headed, no pouting, no lisping, no extra giggles. Her answers are very down to earth and friendly - Surprisingly sweet for a 19 year old.

Santoku bliss

2009-01-14T19:36:00.004-06:00

I have finally graduated to Santoku bliss! All these years, I have tried serrated edges, bread knives, flat knives, thin long ones and so many other kinds, but never have I enjoyed the satisfaction of a knife cut through an onion so smoothly, as the Santoku.

The last block of knives I owned ( a few of them still lie in my kitchen drawer) proved to be the last straw. Wash and dry them - they'll rust; stick them in the knife block - they'll rust. So frustration drove me to the kitchen goods aisle and thats when I saw it! - my latest love - Santoku.
It has been 2 days and I have cooked 3 big meals now with my ever so pretty and surprisingly sharp, red handled, Santoku.

The Look...

2008-10-10T20:07:00.004-05:00

That’s what I call my niece’s “Look”. It’s not a stare, it’s not a frown and so I just named it “The Look”. Ever since she was a baby, she has always had that look. It’s intense and times at which she has directed it at me, I’ve felt as though she isn’t looking at me but into me. Know what I mean? Like she is trying to assess my thoughts or something.

I hope someday, when she is old enough to articulate her thoughts, I’ll catch her with “The Look” and make her explain what she is thinking. For now, I’ll just have to settle with thinking about what she may be thinking! :-)

Yeah... I need to grow up

2008-10-10T19:26:00.005-05:00

In India and among the Indian community all over the world, we have this (sickening) habit of calling elders Aunty/Uncle. Well, I didn’t give it any thoughts until I was called the same way. :(

There was this lady with her 5year old, standing in line before me at a store. I was shopping alone (to be interpreted as “totally glued to the phone yapping with my sister”) and it happened … The kid dropped his toy on my foot and apologized with a “Sorry Aunty!” OMG I just stopped talking for a minute and didn’t know what to say! The automatic “its ok sweetie” that jumped to my mouth just stayed put as my mind was totally bombarded with the “Aunty” bouncing around there… I know, I need to grow up! But one good thing that came out of that incident was a thought as to who else did I shock when I Aunty’d anyone a good 10 years over me? Hmmm…

It has been ages since that happened but I recollect the incident every time I’m “Aunty’d”. But I’m good now... I’m not shocked… so I guess I’m growing up though not there just yet! :(

Arranged Marriages - I do / I do not do ??

2008-08-26T19:06:00.009-05:00

Believe me, my ancestors were real smart people when they started all this, its just the ones in the middle who messed it all up! When civilization started in the Dravidian world, people lived in small communities grouped by their occupation. So there were communities of farmers, merchants, fishermen and so on. The families within those communities were huge and close knit and everyone played a part in keeping the ball rolling. Naturally they preferred marrying within their community as it helped maintain the harmony.
There may have been exceptions (and not so good ones) that may have forced these "common sense marriages" to become rules. These rules then became baselines for the caste system.

And I believe thats from when my smart ancestors turned into dull rule following individuals.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not against rules... I'm just against following rules blindly.
And I'm sorry to say the "marryIntoTheSameCommunity" thingy doesn't seem to be working anymore!!! Before you label me as "the know it all" and move on to the next blog, spare a few minutes, read through the end of this and if you still feel I'm the "know it all", leave me a comment and tell me so.

Take Sam and Sandra for example... (of course I changed their names, people!) Sam's parents searched high and low to find a bride in their same religion -> caste ->subCaste (Oh yeah ... the drill down is sometimes 4 to 5 levels deep). It took them 3 years to find Sandra. Sam told us he agreed to marry Sandra because his parents were happy with the alliance. BS! The marriage happened and then it all unfolded...
Domestic violence.. uh huh.. can u believe it? His excuse? "She isn't smart enough, she doesn't get the way of life here, she is too dull"

OMG Don't you agree with me when I say "smart, intelligent and what not?" should have been on Sam's list instead of the "what's good for my parents should do for me" ???? Atleast Sandra would've been spared.

Well, I agree, Sam and Sandra are on one end of the spectrum... at RED. There are people like Pete and Peggy at GREEN , who do it the psuedo way ( you know, get their priorities in order, parents search for a bride based on those priorities, the would be-s talk and talk and take their time to decide and then get married) and then there are people like me at VIOLET who step in only when they are ready... theAbsolutelyNoCompromise ready!

Ofcourse not every color in the spectrum is blissful! If it were, life would be too dull and boring. For instance, if I had gone RED, my seeramolagu saathamuthu and mendiya kozhambu would have been appreciated more than the no intonation "yeah its good, ammini" but then what about my cynical wisecracks, and deep rooted sense of independence? I bet that would have caused a lot of friction!

As my sister always says, we need to choose our battles. For it gets too tiring fighting each and every one of them.

So unless and otherwise marriages are arranged based on the actual needs and aspirations of the bride and groom, Arranged marriages in this age are a definite "I do not do"!!!

Ani's second milestone

2008-05-12T01:32:00.005-05:00

Time flies.. yet it feels so still at times. I've been to 6 places in the last 8 months but the pockets of void between the travels leaves me longing for more.
T'was a 4 day trip to DC. Ani's b'day celebrations covered more of the first 2 days. We had a gala time and never wanted it to end. The next day we went to the Udvar Hazy center and checked out all the cool fighter jets. I liked the "the stealth" the best and ofcourse we took a bunch'a snaps with the plane model featured in "Top Gun". ;) Well maybe we believed that if we stayed there just that much longer, Tom Cruise would pop out of the plane!

Anyways, the guys managed to round us up and get us back home in time for a steamy hot dinner. The last day was spent just sitting at home and overtaxing Bell's invention to say our byes to friends and family around there.

A bite of the Big Apple

2007-09-12T01:58:00.003-05:00

Finally, after years and years of wishing and waiting, I visited New York!!! It’s my dream city and my trip has but only etched the yearning to live there, deeper in my heart. I love the vibrance the city exudes. What more can I say than “I love NY”.

Our plan was to fly to Philadelphia, meet Siva and Malar and then drive down to NY. But thanks to a delayed flight we were stuck in Detroit for the night. We boarded the first flight to NY the next morning and arrived to find that our baggage had landed in Philly!!!

Thanks Northwest, for your prompt and accurate service.

But the little frustration over the lost (misplaced?) baggage could not dampen my spirits! We met Malar and Siva at the airport and drove on downtown. Siva kept pointing out every bridge on the way, telling me it was the Brooklyn Bridge and suggesting I strike that entry off my “Must see places” list!!!

We parked somewhere near the 46^th & 2^nd and walked down to the Grand Central Terminal. It reminded me so much of the Railway station in Chennai…ofcourse…. definitely a lot cleaner!!! We had lunch at an Indian food stall on the lower level (Café spice.. Malar and I had rumali roti with chicken tikka, Siva had biriyani and Jag had a combo meal) and then walked to the Ellis Island ferry ticket booth.

There was a snake like Q winding along the whole place and after standing in line for about an hour we decided to opt out and board the Staten Island ferry instead.

So we walked down to the boarding area for the Staten Island ferry and saw the War memorial on the way. We had a good view of the Statue of Liberty and the Manhattan skyline. Once back, we headed towards Wall Street. We saw the Battery Park and the famous “Bull”. We took some pictures on Wall Street and then walked on to Ground Zero. Looking at the place brought back memories of the burning towers and it made me feel sad.

Our next stop was the Empire State building. After some photo ops we headed to Times Square. It was amazing! The lights and the life ….I can never forget. We dined at SBarro, shopped on Fashion Avenue (ok ok…. t’was at Kmart) and then headed back to the car. I was so tired it felt like my legs were threatening to break off. All said, it was a wonderful action packed day and all thanks are due to Siva and Malar for being our guides.

We reached NJ an hour past midnight and had a restful break at Sampath’s place. The next morning, Sampath drove me and Jag to Nalini’s home. It was very nice to see her after such along time and I am very glad we squeezed in that short visit in our otherwise tight schedule. We met Sundar Dinesh and Uma for lunch at AAchi’s and then just hung out at Sampath’s place watching Sathi Leelavathi for a couple of hours. Our next stop was Atlantic City. It was my first visit to a Casino and I enjoyed the glitzy feel of the place. We gambled at Trump’s Taj Mahal (tight fisted Jag only approved $27) and Bally’s and snacked on funnel cakes. After waving goodbye to Sundar and Uma, the rest of us drove on to Philadelphia. By the time we got there, I just had strength to admire Malar’s kitchen before curling up for a nice and restful sleep. The next morning (last day of our getaway) was very unlike the previous couple of days. We just stayed home and ate and ate…thanks to Malar’s egg +milk omelette: D, ishtu and veggie fried rice. On the way to the airport, we drove by Siva and Malar’s new home. It has a brick front and had a very nice and cozy look.

Later that day, we were back home with happy hearts and tired legs. Wow what a whirlwind of a weekend!!!

Honeymooning in the Bahamas…

2007-07-10T18:10:00.000-05:00

Four months after we got married, we finally found sometime to “honeymoon”. I’ve always wanted to go to Switzerland for my honeymoon. Being a crazy chocolate lover, I have always wished to take a photograph at the gates of Nestle` with my husband on one side and a big bar of chocolate in my other hand and caption it as “the Loves of my life”. Wishing for the photograph still remains, however I couldn’t make it to the Swiss for my honeymoon (Thanks to the limited vacation we lowly developers get!) Nonetheless we traveled to the Bahamas, the Grand Bahama Island in particular.

The 4^th of July and 2 vacation days along with the weekend gave us an opportunity for a wonderful 5 day getaway! We left in the wee hours of the morning and reached the Grand Bahama Island a little before noon, on the first day. The ride to the hotel (Port Lucaya Resort) took about 12 minutes from the Freeport airport (FPO) and cost us $20 (thanks to my bargaining skills we paid $5 lesser than what we were asked!) On reaching the hotel, check in took about 10 mins. After lunching on “ready to eat” meals, we compensated for the lost sleep and were ready to explore the new territory by 6pm.

Our first stop was at Le Mediterranean. Jag had the chicken penne' (special for the day) and I had the grilled snapper. Any entrée comes with a salad, some veggies (boiled carrots, broccoli and cucumber) and rice / French fries. I didn’t like the rice too much and would definitely suggest the “fries”. Dinner was great and filling. We walked around the Port Lucaya Market place and had a nice pleasant stroll on the white sandy beaches and witnessed the moon rise. It was nice to just sit back and enjoy the cool breeze and look out to the sea. On our way back we had a great time at the Count Basie Square with all the live dancing and entertainment by local bands.

We were a little late waking up the next morning, and that was when I had a good look at our room and the view from the deck. We had a “standard room” with a king size bed and a wonderful view of the yacht club. There were brown clay tiles on the floor, a small fridge, coffee maker and microwave in the room. The only disadvantage is that no shampoo/ conditioner are provided as part of the toiletries. Also, if u plan to cook / heat stuff with the microwave, remember to pack some utensils, spoons and plates as you only get two coffee cups with the room.

The hotel has a tour desk in their lobby (Executive Tours) and offer wonderful tour options. We were right on time for the SeaWorld Explorer – launch boat with a glass bottom on the lower deck. The captain and his aide took us to about a mile into the sea and gave us a tour of the coral reefs. Jag had his first snorkeling experience here! (I was too sea sick and couldn’t even hold my head up long enough to take a picture of him! Poor me!) I was so glad to be back on land when the tour was over. We lunched at Zorba’s (a Greek restaurant – Jag loved it for the white walls, tables and as he says “the clean look” – as for me I found the food and price good but didn’t care much about the ambiance). Later that day, went to the beach and had a nice time swimming – Ok Ok trying to swim - in the water.

On the third day, we arrived at the “Pine tree stables” in style! Yes, our taxi turned out to be a limo!! It was a day of firsts for us - a ride in a limo and later horse back riding! I felt a little squirmy when I first sat on the horse (Apollo) but started relaxing after a bit. We were taken on a tour of the nearby woodlands. Our guides pointed out the native trees and shrubs and some other land marks. We were also taken to the “Silver Pointe Beach” where the horses wade into the water. The tour as a whole was a new experience and we enjoyed every bit of it except for the sore backs!

We then went to UNEXCO and signed up for the Dolphin Experience. Here we were taken to a Dolphin enclosure and we touched the smooth backs of the Dolphin. It was a one of a kind experience but after a while I just got a little repulsive – Thanks to Jag touching the dolphin’s tongue! It was an eventful day and we were tired out by the time we reached our room. We floated in the big swimming pool in the hotel premises, had a sumptuous dinner and were asleep even before we wished each other “Good Night!”

On the last “whole” day of our vacation, we went on a tour of the Lucayan National Park. First we went kayaking through the mangrove. While setting out, our guide took us on a small detour so we could take pictures of the remains of the “Black Pearl” used in the Pirates of the Caribbean series. The ocean current was a little bit too strong for us and we tried to opt out. But our guide (Ben) towed us all thru’ the rest of the way! We were provided a light lunch and sometime on a deserted beach (Golden rock beach). I’ve never seen such clear sea water ever before in my life! It was amazing. We were then taken on a guided walking tour of the nature park and visited some clear water caves which the Lucayan Indians considered sacred.

That night (last night of our vacation) we dined at The Pisces - a very famous and extremely busy restaurant at the Marketplace. The food was nice but I felt it was way overpriced. Armed with a pizza for breakfast the next morning, we headed back to our room to pack and get ready for our flight home the next day.

The best thing about visiting the Grand Bahama Island is that immigration is done even before we leave Bahamas! On arrival at the airport, we checked in to get our boarding passes, crossed security clearance and completed immigration even before we boarded the plane. So when we got to the US, we could just walk out to baggage claim without the hassle of standing in line for clearance. I wish this could be made the norm for all international travels. I always find it difficult to keep awake and be coherent after a 22 hour trot around half the globe!

This was our first visit to the Caribbean and definitely not our last!

Points to Ponder:

Visa – US citizens and Green card holders do not need a visa to enter the Bahamas. Indian nationals on a H1B visa definitely need an entry visa. It takes less than a week to get one and costs around $55. You would need to fill out an application and mail it out to them with your passport and copies of some other documents.
Nassau is considered to be a little busy, Abacos very deserted and Grand Bahama Island a right mix of the two. There are totally 700 islands in the Bahamas…so have a pick!
Bahamian dollar is equivalent to the US Dollar and can be used interchangeably.
Being a vacation spot, everything is a little expensive on the island when compared to the US. So try to stock up on the necessities.

Aboard The Immigrant

2007-06-08T16:42:00.000-05:00

My sympathies lie with my co-passengers. Our ship, The Immigrant, is at mid-sea with no green pastures visible on the horizon. Everywhere I look, I see the sea… the deep dark blue sea.

I’ve been been in this country for the past 4 years. Looking back, I realize that almost 60% of my time has been spent dealing with my visa issues. It all began when I walked into the Consulate in my home country to get a student visa.
A few days after landing here, I remember walking into a bank and asking for information to open an account. I was asked for my SSN. I had no clue what that was. I trudged back to school to meet my adviser and she gave me a “bonafide” as proof of my legal presence. Armed with it, I went to the bank again. I had to wait 90 mins and explain my “SSN” less situation to 3 people before I could open an account and deposit a check I had brought from home.
I heard that for the past 2 years, SSN’s are not issued to immigrants on an F1 visa. One would need to have a “job offer” letter in order to apply for an SSN while on an F1. I was probably among the last few to get my SSN before this rule came into effect. The government may have its reasons for bringing in this rule, what concerns me is “were the repercussions completely thought through?” Be it a credit card, electricity signup, bank account, apartment rental … almost anything and everything requires one to have an SSN. So, if it’s not issued to “certain” immigrants, what’s their alternative? Why aren’t these institutions aware of the alternatives?

Years have passed since that day at the bank but my sense of insecurity as an immigrant hasn’t reduced an iota.

Every time I hear a layoff is due, I fear so much. I know everyone does. But it’s the fact that it’s just not my finances but my very “remaining in the US” that I fear for the most! I have been asking around and I still do not have a concrete reply to “how many days do I have to both find another job and file for an H1 or leave the country, from the day I AM FIRED?” So when need to cross that bridge, it looks like I would have to deal with all these immigration issues and its different interpretations in addition to what any other person will be facing: Unemployment!

I can’t make any long term plans like buying a house without facing a 15% more on the risk factor than a citizen peer would face.

I’m not the first person on this well trodden path, its just that I loathe being here at this point where I’ve traveled too far to go back but too less to reach my destination.

It may just be my Capricornian self searching for a sure foot while scaling a steep slope but isn’t it what we all strive for, security, peace and contentment?

Yahooooo! I own a Yaris!

2006-05-11T00:50:00.000-05:00

Twenty days after I started on my new job, I started searching for a car. My budget was 15k, option - financing. I called / emailed all the Toyota, Honda, Nissan and Suzuki dealers within 30 miles and asked for price quotes. I received 9 calls on an average everyday form these dealers. All in vain!
A month passed, then two. I was still "carless"(mind u there is no e!!!). Thanks to the folks at home, I always got a ride when I needed one.
And then it all started again. This time I had decided I only wanted to buy a "sub compact or a compact". So, I started off with the following on my list:
1. Yaris (Toyota)
2. Aerio (Suzuki)
3. Sentra (Nissan)
4. Accent (Hyundai)
5. Corolla (Toyota)
First I test drove the Yaris. Frankly I hated it! The AT was so sluggish and the car seemed to have no power at all. But the look and feel of the car was just too cool. Everything except the engine was great in the Yaris. But looks weren't just good enough for me at that point. I wanted to go zoom!zoom!zoom! and I knew the Yaris wouldn't help me there. So out went the Yaris. Four more to go...
Next I tried the Sentra. The 125HP engine felt good...especially after driving the Yaris... but there was nothing cute or great about the car. The interior and design was just "ok". Still the good price and power of the engine kept it on my list.
I couldn’t find an Accent to test drive. The local dealership didn’t have it. But the main fact that made me drop the Accent was its 110 HP. If the Yaris with 105HP was so bad, I was sure the Accent wouldn’t be any better. There goes another option.
Down to three now...
The Aerio. I really do like this car. It’s got everything in it. 155HP engine, climate control, AWD, 6 CD changer that plays MP3, power doors and windows, cruise control...u name it and Aerio has it..that too for a very cheap price. The few drawbacks were...the look and feel is not so good. The interior looks to be made of cheap plastic and doesnt have elegance; very less MPG. With the gas prices soaring and with very less resale value, I had no choice but to drop the Aerio.
So, that left me with the Sentra and the Corolla. I didnt want to buy the Corolla. It’s so boring!!! Nothing exciting about it. Come on man...I'm planning to buy my first car...Y would I want to buy a COROLLA??????
I was so dissatisfied. I didn’t even want to test drive it and when I finally did, I hated the Corolla even more because it was the best I had driven in the last few days. I had this bad feeling that I would end up with the Corolla. I returned home and reflected over the happenings of the last 2 days. ok..the Yaris didn’t have much power but everything else was great. The MPG was spectacular. Ya right ...what more could you expect from a small car with a 105HP engine...anyways... The Accent was OUT! The Aerio was great but I was not ready to end up with a "fully loaded" car that would drain my purse with the escalating fuel costs and give me next to nothing when I sell it in a few years. So the Aerio was OUT too! Hmm the Sentra...good price...but nothing interesting about it. The Corolla...everything nice about it...except the fact that I hated it! Don’t ask me why....
I just didn’t like it!
Hey wait a minute....if I am ready to compromise on my likes and dislikes and get ready to buy the Corolla...then Y don’t I just compromise on the HP and buy the Yaris? ooooooooooh....good thought...interesting....You know what...I'm buying the Yaris!
I shopped on the internet for a good price. I played one dealer's price quote against another and did all those cheeky things and finally got a good one!
It’s been three weeks to this day since I bought my car. Its great and I love it. For some reason...the transmission doesn’t seem so sluggish now...Looking back, I think driving my sister's Accord had spoilt me. I guess.. I got so used to the 250HP engine that I just couldn’t accept a less powerful car!
Anyways, My Yaris is true to her name...beautiful and elegant and more than everything...SHE IS MINE!!!!

Selling off my pet!

2006-03-03T16:35:00.000-06:00

I bought my first car on April 21st 2004. T'was a Toyota Corolla '90 model. A perfect student car with dents, scratches, 156k miles and a good engine. The deal started and ended in 4 hrs. I was just walking into the ECS building at school when Pintwo called me. He told me the details of the car and that the owner wanted to sell it off by the end of the day as he was moving to Boston that night.
I had a look at the car, had Pintwo, Warrier and Mihir test drive it for me( I didnt have a license!) and closed the deal. The car stood idle, parked outside my apartment for about 11 days. I used to look at it and feel this kind of joy in my ownership. Its fun to recall the two days when Warrier, Bonnie, Anu and me used to drive to the DMV in the night and practise parallel parking. Poor Warrier, I really wonder how he managed to coach us all!!! Hats off to him!
Almost a month passed by the time I managed to get my license and really use my car. I enjoyed every moment of my mobility. MY car was termed the "UTD bus to Viewlocity". I almost went to every phase in Waterview to pick up a colleague before going to work. The car
was filled to capacity but still it never broke down on us even once. My "turn down the AC while accelerating" and "floor the pedal" acts were always the topics of conversation and fun during those 12 minute rides.
We shared a special bonding, me and my car. Its has seen me cry my heart out, laugh my head out and most importantly it gave me those precious 10 minutes of content and happiness almost every night when I used to drive through Waterview Parkway and just sink in the calm
and serenity of the place.
I'll always remember you my pet and hope you turn out to be just as lucky for your next Owner, as you were for me!

Talk'ing on Google? Here's a tip!

2006-03-02T19:40:00.000-06:00

Peeping into another person's desktop has become a habit for many. Especially when there is an orange flashing minimized messenger window on the taskbar. So how do you keep your chat windows open yet keep them off the taskbar???
Hmm, I heard this trick from a friend and it has helped me a lot as I sit facing the wall of my cube, working on one montior and any person walking by can easily scan the contents of my other monitor(which happens to be the primary) and note all the applications i have open.
First, get Google Talk! I really like the the simple frames of the chat windows which do not call for one's attention.
Second, open google talk focus on the bottom end of the frame and close it. Even when you close it, the application is actually only hidden from view. So position your open chat window right at the point where the bottom end of the Talk's frame was. It would seem as if your chat window is "attaching" itself to something and simultaneously you will notice that the taskbar entry for chat window has vanished.
So now, you can traverse to your chat window by an "alt-tab" and hide it the same way.
Isn't that cool? Thanks Jag, thats a cool trick!

Y all the fuss???

2006-03-01T15:55:00.000-06:00

My mom sits beside me, gives me this patronizing look and says, "Try to stop eating meat. Its not a good thing. " And she rambles on about how being a nonvegetarian eventually reduces my spirituality. I've had these "talks" with her every now and then but nothing has changed my eating habits. Come on, I like my chicken!
I totally agree with my friend Sarah on her views on this topic. "Its always the vegetarians who fuss. I dont like egg plants. But I dont pose a disgusted look when I see it being served!" She's right. I've noticed this a lot in restaurants having a buffet. The vegetarians walk around with a tense+ disgusted look on their face. You will find them reading every word on the labels and wear a distasteful expression if the dish seems to have meat.
Looking at these "veggies", I'm torn between sympathy and irritation. My mom has been a vegetarian all her life. My dad started off as a meat eater and later became a veggie too. My sister was and remains to be an "eggetarian". So essentially, I'm the only "meat eater" in the family. When we go out for dinner, we try to steer my mother clear from the "non-vegetarian" servings. This also limits our choices in restaurants. "No fast foods ( McD is so not veggie friendly! You ask for a veggie burger and end up with the 2 slices of a burger bun with one slice of a tomato, one lettuce leaf and some ranch in between. All this for $4) , no TEX-MEX(pinto beans has beef in it and black beans for some reason, my mom hates!) and no Thai, Malaysian or Vietnamese cuisine(their curry bases are supposed to have fish sauce in them)". So the options boil down to just Indian restaurants, preferably ones that serve only veggie food or else I will have to accompany her to the buffet table and shield her from the sights of Chicken tikka masala and fried fish.
I feel so bad her choices are so limited. But it irritates me to no end when she tries to talk me into giving up my chicken. Ma, I respect your choices in food and have never tried to influence you. Why dont you reciprocate that? Is it the "teacher" in you that always tries to force me to do things that you think are right? Why all this fuss?

Its snowing!!!

2006-02-11T15:27:00.000-06:00

Its snowing here in VA today. Its the first "proper" snow that I am seeing after the "snow in the morning, sun in the afternoon" gimmicks that happen in Dallas. The flurries are so pretty to watch.
I remember the first time it snowed in Dallas(first time after I arrived in the US) in 2004. It was on the 14th of Feb. Bonnie came running in the middle of the night and woke us up. We were all so thrilled to see the flakes sway down to the ground and pile up. I played all morning in the snow and hated to go to work. By the time I returned, half the snow was gone but the excitement remained.
It snowed again later that year but not so much. Just enough to cover the cars and grass with an inch of snow. It was around the same time that I got my cellphone with a camera(Sanyo PM 8200) and took a lot of snaps of my snow topped car with it.

Hey..I got a job!!!

2006-02-11T14:31:00.000-06:00

I got a job 50 days after my graduation. It has given me not only a source of income, but also confidence and a sense of my worth.
on Jan 23rd, I saw a job posting on washington post and applied to it. On the 24th, I had a phone screen and on the 27th I was invited for an in-house interview. After a 2 hr tech grilling, I was offered the job. Its a nice feeling to be part of an org where your contribution means a lot. I like the sense of camaraderie that exists between all the team members.
I passed the first couple of days at work reading documentation. I generally find this the most boring part. But this time, the project is so interesting that I really was very interested. Ofcourse there were a couple of times when I could hardly supress my yawns....still, reading the documentation did help in giving me a better understanding of the project architecture. I have been given a Dell Latitude, a cute cabin and the option to telecommute.
Its been a week now and I know I took the right decision in accepting the offer.